**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
