I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Of course I have a pirate flag
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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