his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
