Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
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