He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
