I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize