...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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