At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I love you. Go after that dick
Randomize
