i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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