I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
