Having a random hookup so left but love u
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
