Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
