susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
