If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
