i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You ate ashes out of my bong
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
