i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
