why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He better not be in your backpack
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
