i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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