U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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