why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize