I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
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i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
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We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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