I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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