dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize