Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
