You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
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