think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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