I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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