Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
