yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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