8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
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Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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