Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I'm passing your future prison.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
