i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
