I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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