A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
