and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
