i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
