yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
