This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
