just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
