I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
