Soap is not a condiment
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
