nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I forget how to act sober
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