it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize