Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize