I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
