playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
