my phone needs a breathalizer
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
