I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
