Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
