Heybabeimwearingurpanties
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize