im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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