Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i wish my penis had a tongue
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
We need to get me chipped asap
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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