is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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